Typical Day

By , September 23, 2003

I have been surfing the blogosphere of late, trying to get a feel for how the other half lives. Now, I am not one for withholding the occasional tidbit of personal information, and I thought myself to be even rather forthcoming in that department. Hardly. Some of what I read on other blogs would make Hugh Hefner blush. Even more surprisingly, it is the female bloggers who feel the need to bare all. Masturbation, copulation– it’s all just out there for the world to see. Which lead me to the realization that I am not offering up enough of the juicy personal details. Shame on me! I shan’t make that mistake today. Hats off to Slinkk, who inspired this post with her tales of reckless masturbation and libidinous cravings.

So I woke up and I masturbated. Then I realized I’d brought a girl home last night, so I rolled over to wake her up for some sex. I guess she was already awake, because she was giving me a dirty glare. She didn’t seem to approve of my behavior. I sweet-talked her a bit, however, and it was on. We proceeded to have sex. It was the really good hot hot caliente kind of sex, too. Yeah!

She was wearing a red leather teddy. Just for kicks I put on my man-thong and did a little dance for her before I made our breakfast. The two eggs frying side-by-side reminded me of a bosom. I masturbated.

The rest of the day was pretty uneventful. I am cat-sitting for my friend Murgatroyd. He stopped by to drop the cat off, and all I could think was “cat = pussy” so I started to masturbate. Murgatroyd didn’t seem to approve, and he made a quick exit, cat in tow. I guess at least I won’t have to cat-sit, but man, talk about blue balls.

Luckily, my friend Blanche came over. Yeah, she has an old lady’s name, but that’s because she’s 92. She’s still pretty hot, and the whole cat-sitting incident had left me vulnerable to her charms, so I hit it. It wasn’t hot hot caliente. More like saggy bony, but beggars can’t be choosers.

The rest of the day is a blur. But now that I am composing it all into a blog it’s getting me hella turned on. Excuse me for cutting this post short, but I need to go masturbate. Laters.

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22 Responses to “Typical Day”

  1. YukiTonbo says:

    drumming my fingers on the table…i waiting for someone to comment first….well, i guess waiting still make me the first one…..

    [Reply]

  2. YukiTonbo says:

    Ok, here is the real comment: this is not personal enough, you have to go more graphic, next post describe HOW, yes, HOW you maturbate, where do you start…then how you stroke it….etc etc.

    [Reply]

    Peasprout Reply:

    @YukiTonbo, uhhhhh, yeah… not gonna happen.

    [Reply]

  3. DirtiMartini says:

    This is amusing in an utterly disturbing sort of way. Why am I laughing? & pls, no mor details, thx! ~PK

    [Reply]

  4. Slinkk says:

    You’re strange.

    But thanks for the dedication anyhow, I’m glad I inspired you. ;)

    [Reply]

  5. mortsci3 says:

    ok wierd but very funny. It was nice to read something funny after all the shit I have been going through.

    [Reply]

  6. i’ve only had one horned melon and it didn’t taste too good. it was kinda gross actually… but if u want to try one i suggest getting one that’s extra horny…

    [Reply]

  7. ThursdayNext says:

    I’m speechless……you slut. : ) : ) Glad to hear you’re having fun.

    [Reply]

  8. staratdusk says:

    good times, good times.

    you know it’s funny I didn’t see your…psychedelic (for lack of better words) comment the whole time I was actually in California.

    and for the record, there are some girls (me) who aren’t offended by guys masturbating in front of them. Some even consider it a turn-on~

    [Reply]

  9. shadowluv says:

    Wow Pea! A real horny side to you. I love it.

    [Reply]

  10. CBrichard says:

    That was quite a descriptive entry! It made for some good ol’ reading. -Richard

    [Reply]

  11. blunt2k1 says:

    sick puppy lol.

    i was speaking on the account of mascots? a huge giant outside a souvenir shop? i dont care about the other countries, im speaking soley about america.

    my lungs hurt

    [Reply]

  12. Anonymous says:

    you’re not serious, are you? do men really masturbate this much? well, i dated a guy once who, when time allowed, masterbated at least 5 times a day ~ but i thought that he was a special case…

    [Reply]

  13. xdolliciousx says:

    arent u afraid that you’ll run out of sperm if u masturbate so much? :P

    [Reply]

  14. Fizzy Pop says:

    No WONDER everything in your apartment is sticky. :)

    [Reply]

  15. OK too much detail. Some things are really best kept private. And unlike most things in life, I don’t think you get better with practice on this one hon.

    [Reply]

  16. tammygirl says:

    wow..all i have to say is..my virgin eyes!!! ;)

    [Reply]

  17. mtears says:

    lmao

    you lead. .and interesting life.

    okay, back to lmao.

    [Reply]

  18. badxmaru says:

    dude totally hilarious! hahahah

    i think it’s even funnier reading the comments! hahahah

    [Reply]

  19. jazmineXu says:

    and then he woke up…..

    [Reply]

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