Coffee

By , October 24, 2017

I’m here today to blog about coffee. I don’t have any particular interest in coffee other than I like to drink two cups of it each day, but I was tasked in the name of nepotism to blog about coffee. More specifically, I was asked to share an article my nephew has written about coffee, but to do so by “blogging about it.”

My older brother is under the false impression that anyone reads this blog. I’m quite confident no one does, and I have Google Analytics to back me up on that. That was a lie. I don’t use Google Analytics because I cannot figure out how to use Google Analytics. I’d like very much to use Google Analytics, so if I’m wrong and someone is reading this, and you have solid knowledge regarding Google Analytics, please contact me. While I write here so rarely that I don’t care who does or doesn’t visit this site, I have another site dedicated to my mobile DJ business, and I’d like to have a better sense of who, if anyone, visits it.

But what, you ask, has this to do with coffee? Nothing. Sorry. Let’s start over.

I like coffee. My parents drank a lot of it, to the extent that there was always fresh coffee on the stove. When I say always, I am not exaggerating. Be it 4pm or 4am, there was hot coffee. My father was unable to sleep for more than 60 to 90 minutes at a time, at which point he had to wake up for coffee and a cigarette. I kid you not. He literally had coffee and cigarettes around the clock, hence the ever-present pot of the steaming.

That’s about all I have to say about coffee. I could, I suppose, add that I have what must now be considered old-fashioned taste in coffee. I can barely drink the stuff served at places like Blue Bottle or Ritual Roasters. It tastes sour. I chalk that up to it being made by relative novices to the field of coffee, who are trying to change things up, disrupt the coffee world, if you will, by bucking the coffee trends. Sometimes that works (Uber, anyone?), but other times it’s better, in my view, to stick with what’s worked for the past 800 or so years. In any event, most of the coffee I drink I make at home, and if I’m out and want what I know will be a good cup of coffee, if at all possible I go to McDonald’s. Say what you will about their food, but they make better coffee than any cafe around.

Now then, the warmup act is over, prepare yourself for the main event. My nephew, Theodore, whom I think of as Teddy, so as not to be confused with my brother Theodore, whom I think of as Ted, has written a long piece on coffee. He takes a far more deep-dish and high-falutin’ attitude towards writing than do I, so put on your thinking cap and head to Teddy’s essay about coffee.

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